Melon Farmers Original Version




John Thomas Dino Slug Platinum Silicone Stretcher...

Sex Toy Reviews

Link Here 14th September 2021

Ideal for anal play and anal stretching, Dino Slug is another work of art from John Thomas Toys. Created using 3D computer software and 3D printers - with copper molding - the result is an eye catching platinum silicone anal treat.

Dino Slug is made from body safe, hypoallergenic materials. Handpoured liquid pink, black and gold platinum silicone, fuse into this profound bespoke offering.

Versatility is assured in this Vac-u-lock and O-Ring compatible sex toy , which comes complete with free large suction cup plug.

Four sizes to accomodate all, range from a small 4.5 version to the extra large at 11.

*Always start off small with anal stretching.

See further details at John Thomas Toys



The Stroking Man III Rechargeable Sex Machine...

Machine of the Month

Link Here 11th September 2021

    Everyone should experience ultimate sexual pleasure -- when the partner is not available second best might turn out to be best of all when you experience the Stroking Man III. If you have thought about a sophisticated sex toy rather than the usual little helper then we cannot recommend more highly the Stroking Man III as your introduction to the world of powerful sex devices.

The Stroking Man III is made by Love Moment and have struck a sensational deal with this Chinese company the benefit of which is shared with their customers.

The Stroking Man III has a strong sucker allowing a secure fit to most flat surfaces. Fit yours to a smooth tile on the bathroom wall and enjoy being pounded doggy style; you could mount the Stroking Man III on the floor and have a lovely ride; alternatively try the machine hand held in missionary position -- the choice is only limited by your imagination.

Improvements on previous editions include more power, less noise and a more compact design. The suction cup design has changed so that the machine can be used against many different surfaces and not just smooth surfaces such as glass and tiles. Previous versions were restricted to a combined thrust and vibration setting; the Stroking Man III allows separate control of thrust and vibration.

What's in the box? -- You get the sex machine with its suction cup, an 8" silicone dildo in beige, a remote controller, a power supply unit and power cord in a retail presentation box with instructions and has a 1 year worldwide warranty. Visit the great team at for more information or to order this magnificent alternative to a real man!

See further details about the Stroking Man III from



John Thomas Convict Platinum Silicone Dildo...

Sex Toy Reviews

Link Here 4th September 2021

Conjugal visitations will never be the same again. Banged up and doing some hard time, the Convict may well be behind bars, but that doesn't mean he can't still give you a good pounding.

This medical grade platinum silicone dildo features a cut foreskin, bulbous testicles and a thick, aesthetically pleasing shaft.

Designed in the UK and made in the USA, this high quality, versatile, beige sex toy can be attached to compatible Vac-u-lock harnesses and sex machines.

Manufactured using 3D computer technology and made with copper molds, expect high definition and durability in this no nonsense dildo.

See further details at John Thomas Toys



Blue Balls XL Fucking Machine...

On limited time offer of £100 off

Link Here 2nd September 2021

Thank you for the safe delivery of my Blue Balls XL Fucking Machine . It was very well packed and delivery time was surprisingly quick. The Blue Balls is my second sex machine and the quality to price ratio of the Blue Balls is unbelievable; I've seen machines half as good for two or even three times the price.

The quality of the build is excellent; the frame is very sturdy and beautifully painted in the trademark blue. Assembly is quick and the set up for fucking is easy; I very much like the simplicity of adjusting the angle and height as you can create different positions during a session without losing the moment. The base of the Blue Balls XL is relatively small, this allows the sex machine to sit on a bed, a sofa, a table or wherever you like to screw, with ease.

The motor is quiet but strong and can't be heard in another room, although your squeals of pleasure most certainly will. The fucking ability of the Blue Balls XL will put to shame any partner; the powerful motor will fuck at a speed of 0-160 thrusts per minute and the depth of penetration can be adjusted from 1.5" (4cm) to 6" (15cm). The remote control is efficient and makes the experience very user friendly.

Accessories are plentiful as the Blue Balls XL will accept the Vac-U-Lock system; this makes the fucking machine ideal for all sexualities as you can use the machine with a dildo, artificial life-like cock, anal probe, artificial vagina, anus or mouth.

I couldn't recommend a better sex machine than the Blue Balls XL as it is versatile, excellent value for money and built to a long lasting high quality.

See further details about Blue Balls XL Fucking Machine

See also Blue Balls XL 2.0



John Thomas Comanche War Horse Platinum Silicone Dildo...

Sex Toy Reviews

Link Here24th August 2021

Brace yourself for a stallion dildo experience of a lifetime. Comanche War Horse has been lovingly recreated from paintings of the 1800's; depicting General Custer's trusty steed, from the Battle of Little Bighorn.

Powerful and glorious, Comanche is a two-tone, brown and beige horse cock unlike any predecessor - wonderfully presented for your anal pleasures.

Handcrafted in body safe; medical grade platinum silicone, every ridge and bump will stir your desires as he slips deep inside.

This dildo comes complete with free large suction cup plug and faux velvet bag - lashings of lube recommended.

See further details at John Thomas Toys



John Thomas The Thug Platinum Silicone Dildo...

Sex Toy Reviews

Link Here 14th August 2021

He's a true bad boy from the wrong side of town. The Thug however, owns an enviable member - which has been loving reproduced by hand, from medical grade platinum silicone.

With it's strong veins and cut foreskin, The Thug boasts a magnificent shaft, making it of no surprise that this is a John Thomas Toys best seller.

Both Vac-u-lock and O-ring compatible, this versatile dildo is great for both anal and vaginal penetration.

Copper molding ensures high definition in every toy and premium materials; mean a durable, body safe investment.

A no quibble 365 day warranty comes with every purchase which can be extended to 3 years.

See further details at John Thomas Toys



Sybian (with stool)...

Sex machine reviews

Link Here13th August 2021

The Sybian has been in production since 1987 which is indicative to its popularity and effectiveness. The Sybian is often described by women as the perfect lover, producing results that leave real sex in the dark ages. Many women claim to have had their first orgasm when using the Sybian and many have experienced their first multiple orgasm. A phenomena known as poly-orgasm (a poly-orgasmic woman has simultaneous orgasms from being stimulated in multiple areas at once; not to be confused with multiple orgasms, which are numerous single sequential orgasms) have been achieved by many users of the Sybian.

How does the Sybian outperform other sex devices and even real sex in achieving a pinnacle in self-gratification for women and men? Quite simply, for women the Sybian stimulates the clitoris and G-Spot, for men it is able to stimulate the male erogenous area called the P-Spot. Stimulating more than one area at the same time can have amazing results creating strong and often mind-blowing orgasms which for some can last for what seems an eternity.

Those interested in buying the Sybian will be assured by the design, quality and popularity of the device. The machine is designed to give the user a lifetime of pleasure (5 year warranty). The user's vibration and rotation speed control and the lifelike design of the male form make the Sybian's features exceed any other device available.

The rotation motor of the Sybian is controllable from 0 to 150 RPM and the vibration motor is controllable from 0 to 6000 RPM. The Sybian is designed to stand a weight pressure of at least 1000lbs giving peace of mind to any user of any size. are the official UK supplier of the Sybian, their price is competitive and delivery is free.

See The Sybian is available in a choice of colours from

Movies featuring the Sybian

Fun with the Sybian is featured on DVD as the star performer in Bonnie Rotten's Sybian Showdown. The sex machine action is described as follows:

Bonnie Rotten is known for pushing the envelope in the world of adult entertainment. Today, she's taking a girl's day in and making it extra fun! She's got nine girls ready to show they've got what it takes to survive her Sybian Showdown . They will be judged on how long they can sit on this bucking bronco while the other girls slap, tickle, lick and tease them to orgasm! Who will win the Sybian challenge? It may be the tiny terror , Piper Perri or the sultry Selma Sins! Either way, these girls are having good times with these good vibrations!

See Sybian details from




John Thomas Prince Albert Platinum Silicone Dildo...

Sex Toy Reviews

Link Here 5th August 2021

Lending it's name from the popular intimate male piercing, the Prince Albert platinum silicone dong comes complete with decorative ring.

Unusual yet innovative; Prince Albert boasts long saggy testicles, cut forekin, exposed glans and protruding veins which adorn the splendid shaft.

The Prince looks and feels great as he pounds your blues away. Use him handheld; attached to a partner's strap-on device, or compatible sex machine.

This versatile sex toy is also O-Ring compatible, body safe and hypoallegenic.

Choose from the four available sizes and two levels of firmness. Free next working day delivery on all UK orders.

See further details at John Thomas Toys



Fall back in love with your toys...

40% off Vive sex toys at

Link Here3rd August 2021


40% off Vive sex toys

Silky smooth pure silicone

Waterproof and whisper quiet

Sex Machines



DP Fucking Machine...

Sex Machine Reviews

Link Here27th July 2021

The DP Fucking Machine was released by Diva® at Christmas 2016 -- available exclusively at for a limited period and with a very low promotional price -- only the early bird will catch this fantastic deal.

As with most machines sold by market leading retailer the DP Fucking Machine is compatible with the world's best and most comprehensive dildo system the Vac-U-Lock®.

The DP in DP Fucking Machine refers to double penetration -- this fucking machine will provide everything required for the pleasure of simultaneous anal and vaginal penetration. The machine is very powerful providing a massive maximum stroke speed of 300 per minute -- with the supplied 15cm (6") anal dong and veiny cock attached and the benefit of clitoral stimulation with the speed controller's vibrating technology, ultimate sexual pleasure is only a purchase away. The DP Fucking Machine is a quality build with an impressive high specification motor and construction of tensile strength steel -- longevity of this machine is not an issue.

As always you will never be disappointed with your purchase from as they always make sure the sex machine  package is full of extra goodies, guaranteed to make the pleasure experience as good as it possibly could be. Included are two 15cm (6") dongs, the Diva® wizard flexible convertor (a device for adjusting the angle of penetration) and a free original magic wand massager which has an rrp of £59.99!

With a 1 year worldwide warranty and free next day delivery there has never been a better time to own this extremely competitively priced machine.

See further details from




John Thomas Rhaegar Platinum Silicone Dildo...

Sex Toy Reviews

Link Here 27th July 2021

Rhaegar boasts a very pronounced glans penis head shape, with a ripped cut foreskin.

The heavily veined shaft features an erotic curvature, guaranteed to stimulate the G-Spot into spasms of euphoric orgasm, time after time.

This medical grade platinum silicone dong , can be warmed or cooled prior to insertion for added sensation and is fully compatible with vacuum dildo systems - including vac-u-lock.

Rhaegar is a striking beige sex toy available in a choice of sizes and firmness and is also O-Ring compatible.

Designed in the UK and made in the USA, Rhaegar comes with a free large suction cup plug and stylish storage bag.

See further details at John Thomas Toys

John Thomas Toys™

Silicone Dildos

Designed in UK | Made in USA

100% Medical Grade Platinum Silicone

FREE UK Next Working Day Delivery | Worldwide Shipping

FREE Vac-U-Lock™ Large Suction Cup Plug with all dildos


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